Tue - May 25, 2004

Mean girls and movie ads



I saw the movie Mean Girls Sunday night. I'm a Tina Fey (only female head writer in the 25-year history of Saturday Night Live and the only reason to watch SNL) fan, and I've been looking forward to her screenwriting debut.




Adapting fiction to the screen is one thing, but adapting what is essentially a user's manual for parents, Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence must have been an extraordinary challenge. Fey does an admirable job, resulting in a comedy that's darker and more disturbing than I was prepared for.



It was also very funny. I had no idea high school girls were so pathological, predatory, and well, evil. As Fey's teacher character (Fey has a minor role in the film) said in one key scene, "It looks like a clear case of girl-on-girl crime".

I have two complaints. One, the movie's humor was almost deadly sharp, but language and content were clearly reigned in in order to avoid an R rating. I hope the DVD edition includes what must have been cut out. Most notably, you can have characters calling each other bitches and whores all day long, no problem, but apparently you can't have one character ask another "are you a virgin?" in a teen movie. Fey had to write around it, using the awkward phrase "has your muffin been buttered?" There was a lot of material that was altered or removed to meet approval, in ways that don't make logical sense.

And Two, we had to sit through 35 minutes of advertising before the movie began.

First, we sat through a form of advertising I'd never seen before, a video projection of static images, featuring local products and services, much like coupons you get in junk mail advertising. This was an oddly low-tech presentation. The slides looked old, dirt and scratches, as though it were archival material from a museum of broadcasting. Mingled in were movie trivia questions, to make it seem like acceptable, benign content, while waiting for the previews to begin. So, we endured it.

This went on for 20 minutes. The crowd got restless. The movie was starting later than advertised. And we were watching drive-in movie type ads while forced to wait. Then the real advertising began. When the main screen started up, we saw an actual TV commercial, a car ad. Then another TV commercial. Then another. I'm thinking, excuse me, but didn't I pay to get in here? If I have to sit through commercials, I expect I should also have my own couch and refrigerator, and watch the movie in my underwear if I want. I had to leave the house, get in a car, and pay money for this. What is going on?

Then the previews began. After being saturated with local ads, and television commercials, we were expected to endure another 10 minutes of annoying ads for upcoming feature movies. I was ready to start a riot. But there were only a few dozen people in the audience, it was a late showing. And the late showing was additionally late.

Fortunately, one of the audience members complained, and informed us that we would all recieve complementary movie passes as a courtesy from Lowe's Oaktree Cinema (which is named in the following lawsuit) which pacified us enough to stay for the main feature. Not as an apology for the unnecessary advertising, but because the movie started late.

I'm not the only one who's displeased. Not surprisingly, there's an effort to end this unwelcome practice. For more info on what appears to be a lawsuit aimed at preventing movie theaters from gouging customers with commercial advertising, visit

No Movie Ads




Posted at 02:32 AM    

Mon - February 9, 2004

Product watch




DETROIT—With gas prices approaching $2 per gallon in some areas and gridlock on the rise, Detroit's three major automakers are stepping up development of their newest brainchild: the anger-powered car.

The Chevrolet Tantrum, one of the new road-rage-fueled vehicles.



"By drawing a significant percentage of its motive power from the unbridled temper of the American motorist, the new anger-powered car will change, or at least take mechanical advantage of, the way Americans drive," General Motors vice-chairman Robert A. Lutz said. "We plan to have these furiously efficient machines careening down America's highways, byways, and sidewalks within two years."

source: The Onion

Posted at 11:46 PM    

Thu - November 20, 2003

Blame it on "The Man!"


This is what we call "playing the race card".

This is what we call "playing the race card".

"Jackson's brother Jermaine denounced the allegations in a CNN interview as 'nothing but a modern-day lynching.'

Jermain, listen: Michael was politely arrested, his attorney issued a statement, and then Michael was given a police escort from his private jet, inconvenienced for 45 minutes, then released. How exactly was this a 'lynching'? What does race have to do with it?

'This is what they want to see: him in handcuffs. You got it. But it won't be for long, I promise you,' Jermaine Jackson said.

Jermain, your brother just posted a $3 million bond. He wasn't in handcuffs for long. He's not hanging from a tree in Alabama, he was back in Las Vegas by dinnertime. How many people get arrested, then get to go to Las Vegas?




Michael Jackson makes bizarre odyssey through Vegas after arrest

6:54 p.m. November 20, 2003

LAS VEGAS – Michael Jackson and his entourage drove a crazy-quilt pattern around Las Vegas on Thursday, trailed by media helicopters and cheered by dozens of people who lined the roads to catch a glimpse of the pop superstar who stands accused of child molestation.

Motorists stopped their cars as Jackson's entourage waited at intersections, and others ran out into traffic lanes, waving as the four vehicles passed.

For more than two hours, media helicopters filmed the scene that was eerily reminiscent of O.J. Simpson's infamous slow-speed chase in a white Ford Bronco.

Several people exchanged handshakes with someone who extended a hand through the dark-tinted windows of a black sport utility vehicle.

"I wanted to touch his hand. I wanted to get his autograph," said Ofelia Felarca, 35, of Henderson.

Posted at 10:19 PM    

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